Wednesday, July 16, 2008

A Love Of My Own

Etta James sings of A Love "Of My Own" isn't that what everybody wishes for. A lot of times we have these loves and don't think they of our own. I found some pictures today of A Love of My Own Ralph Rufus Odwin. Ralph passed away this year in NJ living with his new love.
Looking through this blog that I had forgot I had (360 Yahoo), I found several pictures of my friend Ralph. What fond memories I have of our time together. Ralph Rufus Odwin from New York. We met at a popular reggae club we both use to hang out in the 80's at in Houston, TX called The Carabana. Talk about partying, 3 for 1 drinks, live reggae bands nightly, dj spining dancehall in between and the floor staying packed. Ralph use to like to dance on the Soca songs and man did he dance till sweat was pouring off of him for a big guy. I watched him several times before I approached him to dance with him and a 20 year friendship/love affair was formed. I had the nerve to act like I didnt want to give him my number I was small at the time and wasn't attracted to large guys but I did and he eventually called. Although I was single and living along I didn't want him to come to my place so I agreed to meet him around the corner at a food place. We eventually started meeting at the club when he was off I found out he worked nights for the newspaper so he wasn't able to get off much and when he did he partied like there was no tomorrow. He wore shades all the time and later I found out one of his eyes was lazy so that was his cover. For years we partied together and when I had my daughter he would still encourage me to dance which I think helped me during that time of my life. Years later we decided to take the friendship to a relationship moving in together which didn't work. Ralph had treated me like a queen for so long I couldn't handle seeing the real Ralph which was a person pleaser who neglected taking care of his business as far as bills just to have a good time. He loved me! He told me his mom said I was the horse to win the race whether I won or not. I was slow but asked what she meant and he said mom means you will always be number one for me no matter how we end up. I now know that RALPH RUFUS ODWIN loved me but I just couldn't see it at the time. We split up but remained friends and for his 40th Birthday although he was with someone else we took a cruise to the Bahamas together. Later I went to New York to a convention and he planned his vacation there at the same time so I was able to see his home and places he grew up around while there. We motored back to Texas together that trip which gave us lots of time to talk about things. Ralph eventually moved from Texas, married and we didn't talk much. After his divorce he moved to Fla and then PA where he resided until his death. We had such a strong friendship and love for one another that we would both be glad when we would get a chance to talk and keep up with each other. Ralph's health started failing and he had numerous surgeries on his knees and hips. At one point he told me "girl I take so much medicine I wonder if all this can't keep me filled without food". I called him from an airport in Jackson, MS two weeks before he passed because I had seen someone that reminded me of him when he was smaller back in the 80's. He answered the phone not feeling well but once he realized it was me I can remember it seemed like he perked up but we didn't talk long because I knew he was not feeling well. Little did I know that that would be my last time to hear my friends voice. Ralph I miss our talks about life, living and Lauren.

1 comment:

Laura said...

A Love of my own.....missing him dearly. Laura